Describe what self love is to you?

To me, self love isn't anything in particular. It isn't necessarily definable and maybe that is just due to my age. I think if I had to try to find a way to describe it, it would be knowing myself and being able to accept who I am fully. Until you find acceptance with yourself, how can you be comfortable loving yourself?

What are some ways you practice self love?

I have just recently started to practice in self love. I think from freshman year of high school to freshman year of college, I was just going along with the motions of life. It wasn't until my sophomore year of college that I realized that I didn't love who I was or who I was becoming and I needed to change that. I spent junior year finding myself with the help of my boyfriend and the family I found in a club on campus. I began to soul search more, speak up on what was bothering me, and learning to accept that I can't fix or change everything. Once I was able to come to terms with this, I was able to begin to love myself.

Is there any hardships you've faced while loving yourself?

The biggest hardship I have faced while loving myself is coming to terms completely with my adoption. I experienced bullying in elementary school, anger in high school and heartache in high school. When I was 16, I wanted to look into my adoption and my mom said no. When I was a freshman, I thought I had found a tumor and it caused me to want to explore my adoption that much more. With this came a lot of anger and heartache because I didn't expect to learn what I did. I felt anger knowing my biological father, or sperm donor as I call him, left my mother the second he found out she was pregnant. I felt heartache knowing my mother was 22 years old and spent 3 months contemplating whether or not she wanted to terminate her parental rights.

Describe a turning point in your life that helped to shape your ideals on self love.

I think the turning point that shaped my ideals on self love was when my boyfriend moved to Florida for college junior year. I had to learn that communication was the key to continuing our happiness. I was so use to falling back on him when I needed to feel loved or needed to know how to love myself and eventually I had to be able to do this on my own.

Who are some people who have motivated you to love yourself (negatively or positively?)

My boyfriend is probably the number one person who has motivated me to love myself. My parents and siblings also have. I had a friend who was my best friend since 7th grade and she constantly made comments about me being black or who I hung out with because they were black. She made me hate being black for a long time.

What advice do you have for someone having a hard time loving themselves?

Trust in yourself. Find what makes you happy and make that a passion. Open yourself up to someone who loves you and allow them to teach you to love yourself the same way. They can see what you can’t.

Name a person, famous or otherwise who have taught you about self love.

Beyoncé has taught me about self love from the very beginning because I think she is an extremely inspiring person. I also think J. Cole and Drake have helped me a lot because their lyrics speak to me. Currently, Alicia Keys has been the biggest inspiration because her no makeup campaign shows how well she can love herself for herself.

Is there anything about you (gender, ethnicity, creed, etc.) that has been a driving motivator in loving yourself or that may have hindered self love?

Now being able to love myself, I have found comfort in being African American and the beauty that comes with it. I believe my melanin makes me unique. No two shades are exactly alike. That's beautiful.

Lada: I met Sarah at Le Moyne College through mutual friends. I was president of a club on campus and she attended some meetings. From her input and the interactions that we had, I knew that she was strong and thoughtful. She had a very unique experience and remained true to who she was. Sarah continues to be one of the people that encourages me to be me and I appreciate her for that and more. Thank you Sarah!